ep. 193: Healing After Divorce and How to Help Friends Who Are Walking Through It with Alison Simmons
Alison grew up in a Christian family and knowing Jesus, but didn’t really apply what she learned on Sundays to her own life. A few years into her marriage to her childhood sweetheart, she and her husband fell into what she describes as “dangerous territory.” With two young children under 4, they divorced and she found herself a single mother in the midst of personal crisis.
Her story today is for those who are hurting from divorce, and those who are ministering to divorced and hurting friends.
5 Ways to minister to a friend hurting from divorce
1 - Don’t pretend to have the answers. Because - you don’t!
2 - Understand that it is always on their mind. Expect them to want to talk about it and have a huge range of emotions about it.
3 - Be a good listener
4 - If your friend is not a believer, talk to your friend about the Good News - what Jesus says about them. If your friend IS a believer, speak to them with compassionate boldness.
5 - Encourage your friend to talk to the Lord - This isn’t the pre-formatted grace before meals kind of thing. It’s talking to Him in the same way you would talk to your bestie...
Fast forward ten years and Alison found herself remarried to a pastor’s kid, and traded her relationship with Jesus for her relationship with Joel. She points out that while this is unfair and unreasonable, it’s something wives often do.
But after further Bible study, conversations with Godly mentors, and Holy Spirit revelation, Alison had an “aha!” moment. She truly understood that her relationship with God did not come through her husband. While Scripture does give husbands the responsibility for leadership in the home, it did not release her from having her own personal relationship with the Lord.
Who does God call me to be as a woman of God?
This is the question that confirmed Alison’s identity in Christ, convicted her about what true submission to the Lord looks like, and helped reveal her own personal sin.
And as a result, it’s the pivot point where she turned from being bold about her divorce...to being bold about Jesus.
This is a powerful episode - a message of true transformation. It will bring hope if you’re broken, and challenge you as a wife and beloved child of Jesus.
And once you’ve listened to her story here, listen to Alison’s podcast Grace over Perfection, where she encourages people to live an abundant life even while living in the midst of waiting.
Alison is a busy, audacious, outgoing, sometimes irritable, but always blessed, woman. A few years after becoming a Believer, she stopped investing in hr relationship with the Lord and found herself discontent and angry. It wasn’t until she started making time for God and His Word every day, praying to Him unashamedly, and listening for His response that she began to see a change.
Now she helps moms just like herself get in their Bibles, learn how to apply scripture to their daily lives, and find JOY in the life they are living right now.